a personal moment

i have decided to blog on something that is very personal and intimate. it is a topic that you may choose not to pursue in reading, but its something i just need to get off my chest----literally. like i said, if this is TMI or too much information, feel free to skip to paragraph 5. (disclaimer: please note that if this causes permanent scarring or emotional damage, i will not be held responsible---you need to take responsibility for you own actions. read at your own risk. thank you.)

the topic is breast-pumping. yes, that would be the pumping of the breast----it isn't too late to move to paragraph 5. with the whole PKU issue, i get to nurse every other feeding--thankfully---each time i nurse i have to pump to make sure i'm all empty, and when i don't nurse, and she is drinking her delicious---and nutritious----meal of Phenex 1, i use my new found friend and enemy, "THE PUMP" meaning the breast pump. or we could call it the no rest pump, either would apply. so every 3 er so hours i hook up to the milk machine and extract liquid from my body---which is anything but comfortable. if you calculate that nova eats at least 8 times a day and i pump at every feeding for at least 30 minutes-----that is 28 hours a week--my math skills are impressive i know---that is at least a COMPLETE day of my week that i am hooked to the milker. and that my friends is sick. and that is why i am blogging about it---perhaps it will prove to be therapeutic.

i grew up on a farm and i always wondered why the cows were so crabby and would kick as the milkers were attached. needless to say, i no longer wonder. the most horrifying part is that i am the one attaching THE PUMP to myself. is it legal or kosher to kick myself for inflicting uncomfortable-ness? did that sentence make any sense? NO! THE PUMP is making me crazy! the whole pumping experience would be even more annoying if i whacked myself every time i hooked up. (i would probably look hilarious however.....)

sigh, ok, so that is a bit of an exaggeration. do i dislike the pumping......yes. does it consume my day at times? yes. is it what i need to do so that i can continue to nurse and allow nova's diet to fluctuate? yes. i got some encouraging words from my sister-in-law yesterday and i feel better. i will embrace THE PUMP, i will be THE PUMP, i will love THE PUMP. i will conquer THE PUMP. i will however, not kiss the pump. that is asking too much. who knows where its been.....well, i know, which is why there will be no kissing of the pump. whew! i feel better after letting that all out.

so you decided to skip the intimate details of suzanne's life eh? i don't blame you, it was pretty personal. for those of you who just finished, i hope i haven't scarred you for life. don't say i didn't warn you. for those of you who skipped the blog and only look for the pics---look a little later---nova looks DANG cute today, but she is currently napping, so when she awakes, we will post a picture. but until then, i think i'll go pump.


the infamous phenex-1---nova loves it, and she chugs it!

pretty fancy

happy 24th of july! normally i don't really think too much about the 24th, but here in utah it is a pretty big deal. so for those of you who feel the need to be wished a happy 24th, consider it done.

i have a cute picture of nova today. dan's mom has been here to help out and she just left today. she has a dress that all of her girls have worn and wanted nova to wear it, so we dressed her up in more than just a onesie. she wasn't too impressed with the headband, but she looked pretty fancy!

a princess towel and an enchilada pan

this weekend nova's little belly button cord came off, and it was decided that it was time to give nova her first bath. we had given her sponge baths but not a complete one. this was monumental. a big first in our child's life. we wanted to document it well. dan was SO excited. so we got everything gathered up and started filling up the tub......the problem: our tub doesn't work. not a problem that most people have, but we couldn't plug the tub. this of course doesn't stop the hopes, we are a determined couple. we just decided that until we can get that problem fixed, we would bathe her in the kitchen sink. grandma hope (who is here visiting) graciously did the dishes, since we decided nova wouldn't be as clean if we washed her with the enchilada pan.

we filled up the sink and started to wash. she loved it! the picture doesn't really say so, but once we poured water over her and got in a rhythm she was so relaxed........which resulted in our down fall as well as not documenting the event very well. if you refer back a few blogs ago, nova has a really pretty princess towel, that is a really pretty pink. after we washed her off, we picked her up and wrapped her up in it. it was a serene and peaceful moment shared as she stared into our eyes and we oooed over how perfect and clean our little baby was and how efficiently
smoothly her first bath was. well, we wallowed a little too long in the moment because suddenly, the silence was broken by.......well......i suppose a tactful way of putting it would be to say there was a "passage of gas" except that is not completely accurate at all. it was WAY more than just a passage of gas. it was more of a passage of her last 4 feedings. my arms suddenly felt heavier and dan and i were no longer looking at nova we were looking at each other with our mouths hanging open wondering what we should do. nova looked peaceful but we didn't.

thankfully, grandma hope came to the rescue and grabbed the towel and we quickly put nova BACK in the sink where it looked like we HAD washed her in the enchilada pan. it was at that moment that i realized the that i was indeed a mother. i was touching poop. not only was i touching poop, but i didn't really care too much. in fact, dan and i were laughing pretty hard. nova however didn't think it was very funny. once we got her all cleaned off---the SECOND time, we quickly wrapped her up in a DIFFERENT towel, and swiftly put on a diaper. needless to say, the sink can be cleaned and sterilized and will become a kitchen sink once more.......the towel on the other hand may never be the same again........

nova looking "nova-licious"

nova sleeping and looking cute----i know, i need to be more productive than just watching her sleep, but i can't help myself!

growing like papaya

great news! we have weight loss and weight gain! nova was born and weighed 7 lbs 5 oz, then dropped to 7 lbs 3 oz, then dropped to 6 lbs 9 oz and then by wednesday had dropped to 6 lbs 3 oz. we went on a little trip to the doctor today and she is back up to 6 lbs 14 oz! woo hoo! go super nova! it was a much needed boost! she is now on her new formula which is measured with a gram scale and is called "phenex-1" (sounds more like the name of an airplane, not a protein formula, but thats just my opinion......) the doctor said it would help her gain weight and to grow like popeye----i guess he was right. (our doctor is actually from italy and he is a little hard to understand and i thought that he said it would make her grow like eating papaya----i was later informed that i missed that part of the conversation.

as far as weight loss goes, suzanne is also proud to announce that she can see her ankles after missing them for 4 months. not to great of news compared to nova's weight gain, but baby steps right?

also we took a little picture of of our family when suzanne is not in a hospital gown. we both look a little tired, especially nova----its hard to eat, poop, cry and sleep. its a very strict regime and i can't blame her for being pooped-----literally!

"Pretty Kissable U-know?"

i feel as though there are 3 major positions that i am in these last few days. one, where my chin is attached to my chest because i am exhausted, two, where nova is attached to my chest, and three when our rear ends are attached to our car. i have the rare opportunity right now of NOT being in one of those positions so i thought i would quickly blog on recent news in the hope household.

monday we came home from the hospital and told nova that she wouldn't have to ride in her over-sized car seat for a while. we told her we would just hang out at home and that we would let her grow for a while before we tried to put our little barbie doll in a cabbage patch kid sized car seat. (so that is a bit of an over exaggeration, but needless to say she doesn't fill out her car seat yet.)

tuesday we recieved a call from the hospital around noon telling us that there was a problem with nova's newborn screen and they wanted to do a confirmation test as soon as possible. so we gathered up our stuff and headed BACK to the hospital. (much to suzanne's dismay in several aspects---first i didn't feel quite up to my regular self and my stomach is anything but back to normal. everything i put on made me look like i was still a little pregnant. so after 10 clothing changes i stuck with a maternity top----not that this is relevant to the trip----i just thought i would through that out there. also i was a little worried about the test.)

when we arrived at the doctor they explained that nova's PKU test came back positive. it is a common test to come back false positive so they wanted to test it again to confirm the results. after 45 minutes of the nurses poking needles into nova and not getting the blood because her veins are so tiny, they finally decided to call a nurse from the neo-natal unit to come and do it. she came in and said that they just could have pricked the heel and had the blood drawn in less than 5 minutes. it was a little frustrating. anyway, we headed back home in the over-sized car seat again thinking, that tomorrow would be a day of rest and no more car rides.

wednesday nova's pediatrician (dr hom---his actual name is king hom---yes very similar to king kong----but only in the name---he does NOT look anything like king kong......just thought i would clarify that.....) anyway, dr hom called and confirmed that nova does have PKU. the salt lake metabolic center then called about 10 minutes later and asked if we could come to SLC immediately. i called dan from work, and we rolled out again.

pretty much we were in SLC most of the day. it was a little emotionally draining, but we are all doing well. PKU is a digestive disorder and is what the doctors call phenylketonuria---seriously---quite a big name for a little baby! we like to say that it stands for "Pretty Kissable U-know?" or i'm "Pretty Kute U-know?" its alot easier to say anyway and being the nice parent that i am, i won't be disappointed if thats not nova's first word.......just the second! j/k

basically it entails a really strict diet because her digestive system is unable to convert the protein phenoylalanine. this is in pretty much everything we found out----any meat, dairy, and enriched grains----it basically is as though we gave birth to a vegan! (who would have thought a dairy farmers daughter could even do that!?!?! :) ) it is an essential amino acid for growth, but because she is unable to digest it, it will build up in her system and could cause mental retardation. so we monitor her diet and poke her heel and draw blood weekly and all is well. that kind of simplifies it in a nut shell anyway. its a little overwhelming, but in the whole eternal scheme of things, even if we can't give nova mcdonalds and cold stone ice cream we can give her what is really important. we can share our testimony and help her grow in the gospel, play games and go swimming, have family home evening and even go to disneyland---now if that was a stipulation of the PKU we would be in trouble-----(nova agrees! :) ) food is not eternally important--family is.

we are all doing well though and are ready and able to take on the challenge and trial that i am sure will only bless us and make us stronger together. i am glad to know that Heavenly Father knows exactly what we need. we are so blessed--its that simple.

today however i feel like we can skip a trip somewhere and we will stay home!!! nova and mom are extremely excited! here is also a way cute picture of nova and dan. i think that you can easily say that nova is crazy about her dad and her dad is equally crazy about her!

more pictures

i really will blog about the last few days soon, currently its alli can do to sleep and make sure nova has a full stomach so blogging has kind of dropped on my priority list. but in the meantime here are some more pictures of our "little princess." just when we thought she was the cutest thing, she said 'yeah right' and got cuter on us!

top to bottom:

*dan the day we came home from the hospital. he was pretty tired---labor is hard for a dad too. they looked cute sleeping on the our deluxe blue carpet together.

*we got this princess towel from our baby shower and there is a little crown on it, so we put it on her head after we washed her hair.

*nova getting her hair washed with a toothbrush (she is looking at me like i am crazy----don't you know you are supposed to use that in my mouth when i have teeth?" i tried to explain what cradle cap was, but she didn't really get it. but regardless she LOVED having her hair washed and rubbed.



*shortly after we came home from the hospital on monday dan got out her swing and put her in. he has been possibly a little TOO excited for her to use it. she must take after her mom because she already knows how to act when she is on a roller coaster! woohoo!











*resting on grandma hall's shoulder

she's here!

hooray! we have a baby! i will blog on the whole 'labor and delivery' process later, (there is much to tell---believe me!!) but we just got home from the hospital.

nova sophia hope was born on july 12th at 11:25am after about exactly 12 hours of labor. she is 20 inches long and was 7 lbs 5 ounces. she is so STINKIN cute it isn't even funny. but i will let you decide that on your own.

the pictures are described from top to bottom:
*dan and nova at the hospital (i can't decide who is cuter.....dan or nova.....)
*suzanne and nova at the hospital (suzanne is sporting a hospital gown deluxe with silver snaps on the sleeves from mckay dee hospital's summer line----yummy-licious!)
*nova after her bath--she was kind of sticky when she arrived--she is only 5 hours old
*nova just over 48 hours old and home! (with her eyes open! (even though that is obvious without me writing it........))

anyway enjoy the pictures (even though she is cuter in real life!)

the dinnerware perspective

i haven't blogged in a while mostly because i am "L" to the "azy." that means lazy in case you struggled there. plus nothing extremely blog worthy has come up in the last few days----of course with the exception of saving a small child from a flaming building that nearly collapsed, almost being eaten alive by the ducks in our backyard and solving world hunger. but ya, besides that, nothing blog worthy at all.

seriously though, since the sunday wog i have gone on several walks and have completed a distance of a 1/2 marathon since last friday. which if you count the extra person i am toting about, that would be a FULL marathon. sweet nectar! someone send me a free t-shirt please! sheesh! but despite the great battle won as far as mileage is concerned, what we really are concerned about here is with centimeters. 10 centimeters to be precise, and the closer we are to 10 the better. needless to say, the marathon wasn't quite as productive as we would have hoped for. according to the doctor, we are exactly where we were a week ago. 90% effaced and dilated to a 1. now, don't feel bad for me, i handled the news quite well. i realize there is an end in sight and i am not terribly disappointed. my husband is a different story. this picture describes perfectly how dan reacted to the news. (you would think that he is the one carrying the baby!)

i, on the other hand felt more like doing this:

but despite suzanne's slight disappointment and dan's utter and complete dismay and devastation, i have decided to take the "dinnerware perspective." is the glass half empty or half full? whats another week really? merely 7 days and 7 nights. 168 hours. 10080 minutes. 604800 seconds. its just another exciting countdown right? 604799, 604798, 604797, 604796....

the saga of the sunday wog

nothing is better than sundays. (with an actual hot fudge sundae coming in close second.....but that's another blog!) there is just something about getting spiritually fed and taking the sacrament to remind you what our purpose here in life is. the church makes me so happy and makes me want to be better and i am so thankful for that.

not only do i love sundays because of church, but its also a day that dan and i have to hang out at home together and spend time as a family.

dan really is so awesome. dan made homemade tortillas for lunch, (probably because of fast sunday, and he always gets excited about cooking when he is REALLY hungry.) they were delectable! later he painted my toenails. (not something he would want me to advertise i'm sure. but that is true awesome-ness right there!) it was so nice of him to do that for me, but it was pretty comical. we were both laughing pretty hard. he didn't really know for sure how to do it. at one point he was using a technique similar to sponge painting. (doesn't exactly give you a smooth coat, but thats beside the point!) but now my toes are a nice soft pink thanks to a nice little husband!


later in the evening we decided to go on a walk. (we were secretly hoping it would start contractions.........but alas, here i am writing this blog and not in the hospital........) here is the thing though, dan doesn't walk slow. slow is not to be put in the same sentence as. walking. (hence the early period there. ) he calls it his "missionary stride." i have long legs and i used to consider myself a swift walker, but that was BEFORE i met dan. seriously.

so going on a walk with dan is more like going on a wog. he walks and i practically jog. so we are wogging along and dan decides to wog up this mountain. (so its not REALLY a mountain, but it is an incredibly steep hill that goes up towards the mountain.) i could see the light bulb go on in dan's brain as thoughts of contractions, umbilical cords, and hospital gurneys swirled through his head. "what a perfect way to have a baby today!" he thought. "we'll wog up this mountain and suzanne's water will have broken by the time we reach the top! we'll have a baby by midnight!" so that is what he was thinking. what he says is, "so you think you can make it to the top of that hill?" OBVIOUSLY not wanting to be the wanny of the group, i say "of course i can wog up that hill are you kidding me? do i look pregnant to you? i'm not even breathing hard!" (BUT, inside i'm thinking---"i've always imagined giving birth to our first child on the SIDEWALK? lead the way my fearless husband! we shall give birth TONIGHT!!!") but of course i kept that comment to myself. stupid pride........

so the wogging commenced. i even did jog a little to pass dan now and then just to prove that this hill was nothing. the hill didn't own me, i owned the hill! periodically dan would ask how i was doing and would remind me not to over-do it. i felt pretty good actually despite the fact that we were walking up an incline that would have been dangerous to sled down in the winter. halfway up though something happened. {insert gasp here} in mid-wog something happened. dan had a contraction! (not suzanne, but dan.) he paused and said, "i think i'm having a contraction." this was a turn of events. wasn't i the one supposed to be feeling pelvic discomfort? i swiftly assessed my discomfort. nope, nothing. i looked at dan and said "what?" he said again "i think i'm having a contraction!" not to be anti-climactic, but dan's 'contraction' was merely a charlie horse in his left cheek (and we aren't talking facial either.) we laughed and wogged it out. to make this already long story shorter, we both made it to the top and neither one of us had given birth--unless you count charlie's horse--but he didn't stick around for long--and the only water that ever broke was the sweat on our foreheads. so we turned around and wogged home.

the moral of the saga of the sunday wog is this: while wogging up a massive incline is a great way to induce charlie horses in the glutteous maxximus it is not fruitful in inducing the delivery of nova-eous hope-imus. she is content to hang out in womb-ville for a few more days. and that is end of the saga of the sunday wog.

the weekly update

this last week has been pretty busy last saturday we had our friends, the wrights over for an 'oscar night.' we had dinner together, played games and watched the movie oscar because we are all fans of that movie. (if you haven't seen it i would highly recommend it!) and for desert we made sugar cookies in the shape of an oscar award. it was dan's idea and i gladly let him take on that part of the party. (as you can see dan is concentrating pretty hard......and it looks very similar to the real thing don't ya think?)

monday my mom came to visit and helped me quilt a baby quilt that i have been working on for a while. thanks to my sister amanda (sister-in-law if you want to be technical--but i consider her a sister....) has helped me so much on the quilt. she is the one who convinced me that i could do a baby quilt. you see, i don't hate sewing, sewing hates me. i have never made a quilt and i have never had a 'good time' while trying to make something myself. just a fact. but alas, she insisted that it was easy and i actually have had a lot of fun doing it and i have impressed my husband in the process. so my mom helped me quilt it and came with me to get some items to decorate nova's room seeing that dan isn't really into decorating. it was so fun having her here and i was so grateful for her help. she stayed until wednesday.

thursday i ventured again to the doctor. no change. still at a 1 and still 90% effaced. dan and i have been walking twice a day to see if we can get things moving along, but so far nova just seems content to stay where she is at. which is ok with us........at least for now anyway.....


friday we celebrated the 4th and we had so much fun. we didn't go far because as dan puts it 'suzanne is ready to pop.' so i planned a day full of activities and decorated our house like a good american should! (or someone who has too much time on their hands does.) dan thinks i'm a little nuts in things that i do most of the time, but i think secretly he likes the weird things that i make him participate in.

for breakfast we had blue waffles (that looked green......but that's a minor detail) and whipped cream and strawberries so we could feel patriotic from the get go.

we also went to kung-fu panda which was really quite entertaining. (i learned a trick or two from my friend po the panda. my new nick name is now kung-fu sue. clearly i have skills!)

then we came home and had a picnic in our backyard. i made star shaped captain crunch treats for desert and then we played lacrosse with some cheap-o sticks i found at wal-mart for 5 bucks. not to brag, but dan and i were pretty good except for the time that dan forgot that nova was playing and threw the ball right at her. (that didn't even get labor going........she really must be content to staying in---but no wonder, she probably thinks we are going to beat her if she comes out now! j/k)

we also made patriotic cookies. we still had left over cookie dough from oscar night so we made some cookies and frosted them. (yes, the flour on my face means i am a true cook---call me rachel ray if you want.....oh wait, i already told you to call me kung-fu-sue..... oh well! also you can't really tell in the picture but i made a purple mountain majesty, and a star and dan made a blue plane.)

last and certainly not least we watched the fireworks from our yard. we had a "pleasant view!" (ironic eh?)

i also wanted to put in a little plug to thank those who have served or who are serving in Iraq right now. i also want to say thank you to their families. it is a huge sacrifice that they are making for our country and our benefit and i am so grateful to them all. we live in a great country with so many freedoms and i think that too often we take it for granted and we take those for granted who have given of their time, lives and family members for us to have it.